finally its finished...well the title page is anyway,and the album is made from a golden book he used to read to micheal and i ,and my journalling ,which was quite a raw emotional rollercoaster ride last night ,that left me totally drained, and upset.but im supposing its a natural part of grief ...even 35 years later..so im going to share my journalling with you sisters,just to let those who are in this swap know .i am posting this sat .!my dad passed away when he was 29 years old ,i was 3yrs 8 mths
WHAT WE MISSED
We missed everything
I missed knowing you
I missed being your child
I missed you teaching me to ride a bike
I missed knowing you as an adult
I missed being a special person in your heart and knowing it
I miss you. I miss you sooooo much
You missed seeing me grow up
You missed me graduating with a degree
You missed cuddling me at night before bed
You missed teaching me how to be a better person
You missed seeing me off on my overseas adventures
and worrying about me…
You missed it!!!!!!!!!!!!
And I just can’t ever seem to let go.
I know it’s not your fault, I know you were robbed
I KNOW YOU WERE ROBBED OF LIFE..
How could that happen to us. It’s not fair and I’ll never get over it…
Why? WHY? Why you.
My daddy, you were my daddy and i didn’t know you enough
I didn’t see you enough. I didn’t get to love you enough
And i am shattered. My heart is broken and its not ever better.35 years later
What i just can’t understand is how come it was you. You know when people say. “It happens for a reason”. Well they can all go fuck off.
Because that’s just bullshit.
We were robbed, you know it, and I know it and it just not fair.
We missed so much
We missed being together as parent and child
We missed being proud of each other
We missed sharing a life
We missed living at the lighthouse
We missed celebrations and presents
We missed being a family with mum and Micheal
We missed so much
And my heart will never be the same.
But you WERE here, and you DID love me
And i will NEVER FORGET your spirit and energy
And i will ALWAYS LOVE YOU and ill always HAVE YOU WITH ME,
Because I feel your presence when I call you
And I see your messages around me.
And I know that you’re proud of me.
And i know you loved your life as a father, a husband and a lighthouse keeper.
And I’ll never stop loving you.
Dad, i will love you for all eternity
We missed everything
I missed knowing you
I missed being your child
I missed you teaching me to ride a bike
I missed knowing you as an adult
I missed being a special person in your heart and knowing it
I miss you. I miss you sooooo much
You missed seeing me grow up
You missed me graduating with a degree
You missed cuddling me at night before bed
You missed teaching me how to be a better person
You missed seeing me off on my overseas adventures
and worrying about me…
You missed it!!!!!!!!!!!!
And I just can’t ever seem to let go.
I know it’s not your fault, I know you were robbed
I KNOW YOU WERE ROBBED OF LIFE..
How could that happen to us. It’s not fair and I’ll never get over it…
Why? WHY? Why you.
My daddy, you were my daddy and i didn’t know you enough
I didn’t see you enough. I didn’t get to love you enough
And i am shattered. My heart is broken and its not ever better.35 years later
What i just can’t understand is how come it was you. You know when people say. “It happens for a reason”. Well they can all go fuck off.
Because that’s just bullshit.
We were robbed, you know it, and I know it and it just not fair.
We missed so much
We missed being together as parent and child
We missed being proud of each other
We missed sharing a life
We missed living at the lighthouse
We missed celebrations and presents
We missed being a family with mum and Micheal
We missed so much
And my heart will never be the same.
But you WERE here, and you DID love me
And i will NEVER FORGET your spirit and energy
And i will ALWAYS LOVE YOU and ill always HAVE YOU WITH ME,
Because I feel your presence when I call you
And I see your messages around me.
And I know that you’re proud of me.
And i know you loved your life as a father, a husband and a lighthouse keeper.
And I’ll never stop loving you.
Dad, i will love you for all eternity
Lisa xxx
